How to Handle the Sex Talk With Your Son
A dreaded conversation to have with your son is talking about sex, but it may be up to you to have this talk with him. Here are some tips to get you both through what might be a very awkward series of conversations.
Start Introducing the Conversation Early, But Slowly
There is no reason to have just one big conversation with your son where you try to explain absolutely everything he needs to know about sex. It is okay to start gradual with this type of conversation, especially based on his maturity level at different phases of his life. If you wait until he is a teenager, he will have already learned a lot about it elsewhere, and this makes it hard for you to teach him lessons about consent and protection. Gradually have conversations about it and always be there to answer his questions when he asks.
Work On a Need-to-Know Basis Based On His Age
Your son’s age and how mature he is during different phases of his life also determine how to approach the sex talk. When your son is younger, this may include teaching him about his anatomy, but approaching it in a way a young child would understand. When he gets a little older, you may start talking to him about puberty and reproduction, which then leads to more serious talk about sex when he gets to his pre-teen and teen years.
Make Sure He Understands What Consent Is
The reason you keep getting advice that your son needs to know what consent is, is because it is so vital. Especially in today’s culture, when your son sees so many different types of behaviors on TV and on the internet, he needs to know what is right and what is wrong. In terms of being intimate with a girl, ensure that he doesn’t just understand that no means no, but that he knows how to get proper consent from a girl. That pushing a girl into doing something is not right, but also that he should never feel pushed or forced into something he isn’t ready for.
Instill the Importance of Safe Sex
Naturally, you need to teach about safe sex as well. As you are having the sex talk, when you think he is old enough to start being physical, explain the importance of safe sex. Don’t just cover protection to avoid pregnancy, but also teach about the dangers of different sexually transmitted diseases and how to avoid them with protection.
If you don’t feel comfortable with some of these topics of conversation, find someone you trust to discuss them with your son.